Thursday, November 11, 2010

"Naggy" and Bossy

Have you ever thought you had at least one area of your life pretty much under control only to discover that you couldn't have been more mistaken?

We were coming to the end of our visit with the grands. I was sitting at the large kitchen table (large is the only size that will do when you have five children) with my grandson as my husband walked by on his way to put something in the car. "Why don't you grab the suitcase as long as you're going out?" I helpfully suggested.

My grandson looked at me with one of those worldly-wise smiles teenagers tend to give their elders and said, "You're so bossy and naggy!" We both had a good laugh at my expense, but his words left me feeling a bit unsettled.

I thought about his little jibe for days afterward. Is that really the way I sound Lord? I thought I was just being "helpful." I began listening carefully to my own words, and while J. may have said made that comment in jest, I realized there was something about them than rang very true.

I seem to be forever saying things that begin to sound a bit more like orders than "helpful suggestions." I like to be organized and have a plan (some might say I tend to be rather controlling), and since my husband is with me all the time he gets the "benefit" of hearing me verbalize those plans....often. I'm beginning to cringe inwardly every time I hear myself sounding, for all intents and purposes, like a little drill sergeant.

Those verses in Proverbs reverberate in my head:

"It is better to live in a corner of a roof, than in a house shared with a contentious woman." Proverbs 21:9
"It is better to live in a desert land, than with a contentious and vexing woman." Proverbs 21:19

I am tempted to make excuses; argue that I'm not being contentious. Perhaps not, but I have been naggy and bossy, and it is just as unpleasant. And, come to think of it, I can be rather argumentative - in a "pleasant" sort of way you understand.

My grandson preached me a much needed sermon - succinct and to the point. I'm asking the Lord to help me - to put a guard on my tongue. I've also apologized to my husband. I would so much rather have this said about me:

"She opens her mouth in wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue."
Proverbs 31:26

"Set a guard, O Lord, over my mouth; keep watch over the door of my lips." Psalm 141:3


Picture: my wise grandson