Monday, April 23, 2012

Good-by



I walked through the living room and into the bedroom, and it rolled over me like a gentle wave. I hardly recognized it for what it was. After all, here I was in the brand new home we had long prayed for. Everything  new and sparkly - from the stainless steel appliances to the window panes. There's a fireplace, a deep, white tub and hardwood floors - things I had only dreamed about before. The pictures are on the walls, books line the shelves and quilts cover the beds.

Yet there it was - a sadness born of homesickness for the old home. It took me by surprise. Surely I wasn't missing the worn old cabinets, the dated tile floor or the stained carpet in the bedroom. I had everything I had dreamed of right in front of me.

"I'm not feeling quite at home yet," I sheepishly admitted to my husband. "Neither am I," came the unexpected reply.

It isn't the things we are missing. We lived in the other house for twenty-eight years. It was a silent witness to the laughter and tears of a growing family and sheltered us as we walked through storms we thought we would never survive. It holds secrets only our individual hearts will ever know. And just when life seemed to settle into a quiet routine grandchildren burst into the rooms, and they filled with noise and life once again.

Slow tears come as I finally say good-by. Everything was such a hurried blur when we packed up and moved away from that dear home. I hardly had the chance to whisper thanks. Thanks for holding us so closely and loving us so well. Thank you for the gift of twenty-eight years of memories - precious moments, hard moments, growing moments.

Now we go about making this house a home.

Blessings,
Linda


17 comments:

  1. Oh, Linda!
    I'm sorry that there is the difficult in saying goodbye to a house full of memories. But, I rejoice in the new memory makings that will unfold in your new house.

    This post is beautiful. Truly.

    Hugs to you,
    Sarah

    ReplyDelete
  2. maybe we should all move more often...

    ReplyDelete
  3. Oh this brings tears to my eyes! We moved two years ago from a house we had lived in for 20 years. It was so hard - much harder than I'd imagined. I'm still unable to drive past "the old house". Though this new house has become a home - but oh how difficult it was!!!
    Blessings,
    Lisa

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hello, sweet Linda. It somehow seems appropriate that after "meeting" you several years ago when you were doubting that you'd ever sell your old house and property, that I clicked over from your FB post today to find this post. It seems we always leave a piece of our hearts in the places where we make so many memories, even while we're moving on to make new memories in new places. I wish you much love, joy and happiness in you new home, and many happy new memories.

    Love and hugs,

    Diane :o)

    ReplyDelete
  5. How fortunate you were to have those years, as you already know. My parents were married almost 56 years, yet only 10 years in one home--their first owned one since they were first married, which was before God called Dad into the ministry. They had to wait until they were 62 to get that special house.
    There was so much happiness there.
    I remember the 9 years spent in the Barnesville parsonage---the longest Dad was at a church. It was difficult for us to leave: so much occurred in those years and as you said, ". . .many secrets held by our individual hearts. . ."
    I think homes can become a vital part of who we are. I know this tiny home has for me. I grouse at times about the lack of space, but I'm sure I will always remember with a smile/laugh about the Christmas we moved furniture and packed 5 adults and 5 children in the two main living areas complete with Christmas tree, toys, and gifts!:>)
    Lovely, heartfelt post---one to which a lot of us can relate.
    Happy making of new memories in your 'now'home.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Thank you for sharing Linda. How bittersweet! In time....

    ReplyDelete
  7. I love this one, Linda. I shed some tears as I thought of the years you have waited for this, of you sitting with those boxes so many years ago, when we met, thinking you were moving soon. Your new house is so beautiful - must seem kind of like a vacation right now. I know you'll love it soon.

    I know I would feel the same way if we ever left this house - or especially the yard. I'd love fresh and clean and new, though!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Very sweet. When we moved here after 20 years and three babies in another house... I was worried. I wondered if I would be afraid at night in the dark hallway ... would I fall down the stairs in the dark (they were on my route from kitchen to bedroom) funny worries. I settled in fine. I think it helped that I still had a young son living with us (o: Now 4 Grand babies... have grown up here (o:

    ReplyDelete
  9. Oh Linda...happy/sad hug coming your way. This reminds me of an old song of Amy Grant's... "If These Old Walls Could Speak."
    If you go find it... take a tissue. Your words here strike a familiar chord and I'm glad you took the time to embrace those emotions. They are a gift and so are your words.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Hi Linda! I can only imagine! It was hard enough watching my kids grow up and leave home...
    If the walls could talk, Linda, I know they would say thank you back ~ job well done!
    Last spring, I said "good bye" to a really great sofa set that we didn't need any more. It had gone on to Jason's apt. here in town and then when he moved to TX it ended up in our garage. I was sooo happy to pass it on {after putting a "free sign" on it} to a family with children. I smiled thinking that the sofa would be well loved again.
    It must be pretty intense with a whole house!
    Bless you, Linda, as you move forward ~ creating new sweet memories!
    My rhubarb is coming up so nicely this spring!
    Blessings always,
    Maria

    ReplyDelete
  11. (((Linda))) This is precious. We've lived in our house for 23 years - I'd have a hard time leaving. I so admire you for looking forward to making your new house a home. I have no doubt that with you in it, it already feels like home.

    ReplyDelete
  12. On the bright side... you can carry those memories forever with you! And now a new home to add to those memories! ((hugs))

    ReplyDelete
  13. It will all be o.k., Linda. When the new home is filled with laughter, smiles, love from friends and family. We've been in our house since 1968; sometimes I wish I could have a new little log cabin back in some wooded property we have. Popa says he can't leave his shop.

    ReplyDelete
  14. I know exactly what you mean! Before my family moved to our current house, I spent the day in the old one cleaning and packing up the last bits and pieces of our lives there. As I closed and locked the door behind me for the last time, I felt overwhelmed. I drove to my friend's house around the corner and just cried and cried. I felt like I was closing the door on the place where my babies had grown up. And I think each of these small experiences of grief makes me long for that home where there will never, ever be any more goodbyes.

    ReplyDelete
  15. This really touched me, Linda. I did get to say goodbye to our old house in Waco when we moved here. But none of this like this house. Then again, it's all we can afford. I wonder when we do leave someday, will I miss the cramped memories? Probably.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Oh Linda I can totally relate. I would love a brand new house but in spite of the "issues" with this one it's where all kid's grew up and memories were made. I'm reluctant to walk away from that. But making memories doesn't stop. I'm sure your new home will be filled with love and laughter and new memories just waiting to be made.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Adjustments take time, and moving after living in a house for a LONG time is often heartbreaking even with everything new.
    Determine to be happy and plant a tree and some bushes and soon it will be home to you.

    ReplyDelete